Memoirs Of The Metamorphosis

STAY READY

_{^{“I stay ready so I don’t have to get ready}.” – Conor McGregor.}

Life has a funny way of throwing unexpected curve-balls at us when we least expect it. It’s crucial to stay prepared and ready for anything that comes our way. Let’s dive into a personal experience that taught us the importance of preparation and share powerful tips to ensure you’re always one step ahead. Get ready to embrace the secret to unlocking a life filled with success and avoid being caught off guard!

Expect the Unexpected: Learn from my Gas Cylinder Mishap!

We normally have a spare cylinder filled with gas so that when the one currently in use runs out, we can simply switch to the standby cylinder devoid of any unnecessary stress.

However, I failed to get a refill in place after the last “standby” was put into use, I reasoned that I’d get the spare one refilled by the weekend thereby leaving my household exposed to the reality that we could run out with no spare one available, and also factor in the part that I misjudged our gas usage.

The thought crossed my mind a few times as the week ran along but I mentally insisted that I’d get it by the weekend, weekends are for running errands right?

…but then it happened. This fateful morning while preparing the children’s breakfast for them to take to school, the flames on the burners all dimmed at first, then they went out. Imagine the horror of the realization setting in, “There is no “standby” to switch to, and school meal for the children is not ready.

I had to suspend everything else to go get a refill which in turn impacted on the preparations to get them to school before the school’s resumption time.

The valuable lesson therein is the need to anticipate unforeseen circumstances and be prepared for anything that would come on the way.

Don’t Wait for the Perfect Moment: Act Now!

We often fall into the trap of procrastination, thinking that we can always address important matters later. However, life doesn’t wait for us to be ready. Just like I misjudged our gas usage, we can misjudge the time we have to prepare for the future. Start taking action today and avoid being caught off guard when life throws its surprises your way.

The Parable of the 10 Virgins: Be Wise and Prepared!

Reflecting on the parable of the 10 virgins, we can draw valuable insights. The wise virgins were prepared with enough oil for their lamps, while the foolish ones were caught unprepared. Similarly, in life, it’s essential to stay prepared and have the necessary resources, knowledge, and skills to tackle any situation that arises.

Embrace the Power of Planning: Design Your Desired Outcomes!

While we can’t control every aspect of our future, we can certainly shape our desired outcomes through careful planning. Take charge of your life by setting goals, creating action plans, and adapting along the way. By having a roadmap, you increase your chances of success and decrease the likelihood of being caught off guard.

Stay Ready, Stay Resilient: Adaptability is Key!

Life is a series of unpredictable events, and our ability to adapt is crucial. Build resilience by embracing change, learning from setbacks, and developing a flexible mindset. When you’re prepared and adaptable, you can navigate through challenges with confidence, turning them into opportunities for growth and success.

Life is filled with unexpected twists and turns, but by staying prepared, you can transform those surprises into stepping stones toward success. Don’t wait for the perfect moment; start preparing today. Take control of your life, plan for the future, and cultivate resilience. Remember, the power to shape your destiny lies in your hands. Stay ready, embrace the journey, and unlock a life of endless possibilities!

DELAY

Why do we experience delay?

This was the question I asked the Holy Spirit this morning on our way from home to my daughters’ school. We had been ready on time and when it was time to leave there was a car blocking us and we needed that car to move out first. I waited patiently for the driver to come and move the car but it seemed as though he was taking his time to do so. Finally, we left and it was already 7:35 am. I felt so angry and upset deep within as it meant that we were not going to be at the school by 7:50 am

When we got to the intersection into Ijesha road (where we live), there was traffic, and in my annoyed state, I asked “Holy Spirit, why do we experience delay?” You know those moments that you have done all that you possibly can to ensure a certain outcome and yet, it does not go according to expectation?

I really felt furious but I felt a leading to lean into God at that moment. So I started praying and talking with the Holy Spirit, admitting that I needed him and that I trusted him to make everything go well.

I really would have wanted a response to my question in an audible fashion, however, God chose to speak to me in other ways.

First, shortly after I started speaking with him, the traffic moved on quickly. Secondly, I felt a sense of peace when I resigned myself to the truth that there was nothing more I could do physically to salvage the situation. Thirdly, the inner routes that we normally follow were devoid of traffic and finally, when we had made it to school, my daughters were allowed in without any major fuss.

So, why do we experience delay?

There is no one-size-fits-all answer to this question as every situation is unique, however, I realized that within every delay, is an opportunity for us to lean in to God and let go. I also realized that my frustrations come as a result of me feeling that I am not in control of the situation when in truth, I am not supposed to be in control, God already is. So I need to be more than willing to let go and let God have his way. Does that mean that every delay is inspired by God? No.

The reality is that like a river which upon meeting an obstacle, meanders its way around the obstacle in order to forge ahead in its flow, so also God’s purposes and plans. When something happens that appears to truncate the move of God, he is unstoppable, he makes a way out of that seemingly closed path. Also, realize that he holds time in his hands and it does not affect him. Delay is the feeling that time is forging ahead while we are seemingly standing still, but within that delay is an opportunity for us to be more like Jesus, building endurance even as our hope remains unshaken.

Delays are only temporal if we choose to see the value that can be gained from the experience.

WALK YOUR OWN PATH

I was reminiscing on my days in university and this memory came to my mind.

“I had a friend whose surname rhymed with a short form of my name.

We always attended lectures together and afterwards when the day was over or if we had a break in lectures, we’d walk home together to his place or to our various houses. Frequently, whenever people didn’t see us together, they’d ask, “Hey Andy, where’s Bandi?” I’d smile and wonder at how people thought we were inseparable… we were each other’s side-kick you see.

Whenever we walked, we walked at pace; ‘twas as though we were being chased or something, you can imagine the way those athletes do those walk-races (pardon the irony), OK, just touch it down two notches, all I’m saying is that we walked very fast.

On this certain day, we were walking home with a few other friends of his and I was feeling out of the loop cos my side-kick was conversing with the other guys, and the gist had a way of not being inclusive of me, then I observed that they were walking at their pace and I was trying hard to catch up to them…

Almost immediately, I slowed down and decided to walk at MY PACE. I wondered, “Why am I trying to keep up with them, they are moving at their own speed, and I am not included in the conversation, to what end?”

It was as if a light bulb was turned on in my mind… I saw how that I was allowing others to make decisions for me and thereby allowing them to take me in directions I didn’t want to go.

I learned on that day that:

My life’s direction is not determined by anyone but by myself or anyone that I allow to direct it, and it will be directed from the point of view of what they think is best for you even if you do not think it’s the best for you.
When you hand over the reins of your life to someone else, do not turn around and blame them for taking it in a direction that’s against what you wanted from the beginning…it’s apt to say here that if you stand for nothing, you’d fall for anything and if you spit in the wind, it will blow it right back into your face.
The “best” friend feeling you feel, is not always reciprocated to the degree of your feelings…
Finally, one of my ideals in life was born, “NEVER walk/move at the pace of others (Friends, relatives, colleagues, others) because you are not necessarily headed to the same destination.”

So, like someone sang, “…follow me, run MY race…” I have made a choice, even though it may not be perfect, I choose to determine whatever outcomes I desire.

LOVE IS BEAUTIFUL

We woke up this morning to memories of this day 2 eventful years ago..
We wondered how it should be that we who were newlyweds then are not only eternally joined but still working well at it…
I share with you, a poem celebrating my wife and best friend Anita Giwa:

You’ve been a great friend
You’ve been a faithful lover
You’ve been a supportive wife
Above all, you’re my great friend.

We’ve had arguments, not a few
We’ve even disagreed, at times
We’ve experienced emotions of all kinds
But I’m glad I’ve got you, friend.

I’ve experienced love from you
I’ve seen your kind heart upclose
I’ve made decisions that made no sense
Still you’ve stayed by me, a friend.

Our lives have grown through phases
Our love has weathered a few storms
Our Joy has known no bounds
Because we have grown as friends.

It has not been by effort alone
It has not been by our wisdom
It has not been by village sense
God has been our ultimate friend

Many have come along on this way
Many have fallen on this way
Many have seen joy elude them
We are together, always friends.

Not to us, be the glory
Not to us, be the praise
Not to us, our hearts won’t take pride
But to our God be praise for these years together.

I’ll always love you babe, as long as there’s breath in me. :*

9 LESSONS I LEARNED FROM MONOPOLY

I enjoy playing the game of monopoly, when I was growing up, I was told that monopoly was a game that encouraged gambling. I was rather intrigued by the game but I held back cos of the G-word and I didn’t want to do what was wrong…

A few times, I put my hands at the game and I found that it was not what they all said it was and yes it was fun for me as well, I mean after all I could role play that I had cash to do whatsoever I wanted, but I found out that the game could be a long drawn affair as well, or maybe because I didn’t know the game that well then, it felt boring after some time.

Then came the time that I gained recognition for what I stood to learn from playing the game. Yes, playing the game. What I have learned from the principles (not new principles) are things that I apply to my life, and I have seen gains so much and also have my dreams come to reality…

EVERYBODY STARTS AT THE SAME LEVEL – everyone begins the game from a start point, with the same amount of resources, and opportunities ahead of them. No one has the excuse of saying, “It wasn’t a level playing field”. So also in life, you’re at the right place to begin, and all you need is already available inside of you.

EVERYBODY HAS A SHOT AT MAKING CHOICES AND DECISIONS – when you move your piece, wherever you land on, you have the option of buying the space or passing on the option. When you buy, the rule is if you have the complete set of blocks (denoted by colors), you can begin construction and the highest you can build is a hotel (4/5 apartments as the case may be). It’s up to you to go that far or just own one out of the complete set and say, “this is enough for me” but you will never win, even if that’s just what you want. The enemy of better is best; do not settle for less than what you can have.

EVERYBODY HAS THE CAPACITY TO IMPROVE THEIR LOT THROUGH THEIR DECISIONS – what you use your resources to acquire determines if in the long run, you’d be the last man standing. So also with life, I am a summation of all the choices that I’ve made since I could make a decision. The quality of life that I live now is a result of decisions I’ve made in the past, good and bad; my future is dependent on the right or wrong decisions I’m making today.

THERE ARE DIFFERENT TYPES OF INVESTMENTS THAT YIELD DIFFERENT RESULTS – Owning the properties that are colored dark blue represents a more valuable decision than those of any other colors. But owning other properties in other areas still represents income that may keep you in the game, though not necessarily winning you the game (except if you own all the other “lesser” areas). Therefore, it’s up to you to get your priorities right. Strive to own what would yield the better results.

IT’S ALL ABOUT REAL ESTATE, BUT NOT RESTRICTED TO REAL ESTATE: some say that monopoly is all about real estate, but I’d say it’s a game that tests the quality of your choices. Shelling all your resources on properties that do not carry weight (no high-yield rental) would keep you at the mercy of those owning better cash-yielding properties. Winning, which is the goal of the game, therefore shows if your strategy is good or not.

NEVER PLAY WITHOUT A STRATEGY – this cannot be over-emphasized. Know what you want to do and then stick to the game-plan, make necessary adjustments along the way, but always have a plan.

EVERY DAY TRADING IS TAKING PLACE; YOUR DEVELOPMENT DETERMINES WHAT PREMIUM YOU CAN GET – at a point in the game, you’d have something that an opponent needs for which you don’t have to trade cash to get. You can swap those items. Life throws up such opportunities at us as well; it’s not always all about cash. It could be a service or something you can offer to get what you desire.

YOU DO NOT WIN THE GAME AT A GO – every player has the potential to win the game just by showing up, but only that player that made the best choices overall, gets to be the last man standing.

IN THE END, IT’S THE MAN WHO MAKES THE BEST DECISIONS THAT WINS – therefore strive to be that last man standing.

The error therein is to think that these rules/principles apply only to the game, but the bigger picture is this, LIFE.

I am playing to win, are you?

DISTRACTIONS

I love to write, read, learn new things and have fun while I’m at it. I enjoy good food, good music, a good laugh, a hearty conversation and solving people’s problems (okay, mine inclusive).

Most times, I say that I can do one or two or three of any of these activities and other ones not mentioned at the same time (like multi-tasking), sometimes, one of them desires and deserves top priority attention. Oh, did I fail to mention that I love playing too? ;).

I can play all types of games, on phones, consoles, board, paper, anything that would keep my mind “engaged” I tell myself.

I guess what I am getting at is the fact that I love being engaged in one thing or the other and so when I need to be fully zoned into one of those things, I find myself wanting to be engaged in doing another thing at the same time which would be to the detriment of the original thing that required my full attention… Like right now as I write, I feel like listening to good music that would not allow me to concentrate on what I am writing… I was writing on another topic when I stumbled upon this topic and decided to pursue this one without completing the other, telling myself that this idea needs to be fully explored and that the ideas for the other one will always be there for me to write later, but this one just cannot wait…hmm!!!

Wait, who am I kidding? What good is it going to be if the music I so badly want to listen to only ends up ensuring that the thoughts I want to share are blocked out?

Okay I confess, most times when I’m taking a poo, I love to solve puzzles as well; taking a poo doesn’t get any interference as it were, but check out the hours i can spend in the loo not because my business in there isn’t over, rather, i want to finish the puzzles first.

Imagine how long it takes me to eat as I surf the internet at the same time, trying to read all the articles that I find interesting and informative… (*Whispering for only you to hear* @lahmeet has threatened to seize my phone on several occasions so, ahem, I guess I’m walking a tight rope on this one)

Several times, I make conscious decisions that I would not do so and so while I’m doing this other so and so activity and before I can say “Lasgidi”, I’m taken away from my original so and so activity… oh wretched man, that I am, who would deliver me from these Distractions? You guessed right, ME!!!

I can’t tell you that I’ve got the perfect solution to ensure that I don’t get distracted other than to say “STAY FOCUSED” but then, you know the petty thieves of your time and focus, as I do mine…

Maybe, just maybe, having a planned schedule and disciplining myself to keep it would help me massively… I shouldn’t be too rigid or too flexible, but remain in a position where everything works in my favor.

A wise man once said “Catch for me those little foxes that spoil the vine”

The laser beam is but a collection of lights brought together and then focused to such an extent that it can cut through anything…

*Straight Face* So, I have concluded that I would focus my attention on one task and successfully complete it rather than have a series of tasks half-done. Excellence demands that I do that in order for me to be successful.

*Sigh* Even as I type, a ping just came into my phone…yikes!!!

A BELATED POST: DEMOCRACY DAY THANKSGIVING

…And so it was that I woke up today feeling good; scratch that, good does not begin to justify how I felt. I had cause to reflect, not on the fact that the day’s Democracy day, although a lot of things do not add up to the reality of Democracy at the moment, but whatever I think, it’s Democracy day.

But I digress a bit… for a few days now, there’d been only 5 minutes of electricity supplied in every 12 hours, that’s 10 minutes give or take of electricity in 24 hours for over three days. Sigh!

And so, when the electricity was restored, it felt like the norm of 5 minutes in 12 hours routine was gonna happen so I “tskd” away the thought. But then it became an hour, then two, three, four and five and then I saw something seemingly insignificant, that made me very, very thankful.

You see, whenever electricity goes off, water cannot be pumped and if water cannot be pumped, means I’ve gotta fetch water from the well in the compound where our flat is located and it’s such an arduous task and I won’t allow my wife to fetch the water or buy from vendors who have a time schedule that I’ve yet to come terms with…

Still that’s not what caught my attention, but that most of the time that the water in our storage threatens to run out, something happens such that we don’t have to go through the stress, of going to fetch water from the well within our compound or buy water from the vendors; Electricity is restored and water pumped no matter how little the time that the electricity would stay.

Therefore, it got me thinking (and ultimately thanking), “There is just so much that’s happened in my life for me to be grateful that it is not worse than it is at the moment.”

You see, I’m human (of course you didn’t think I was an animal did you?), which makes me insatiable (always wanting more, better), therefore I tend to think that I deserve better in a way that reeks of ingratitude, rather than reflecting that what I have is someone else’s better..

Little hinges swing huge doors I have heard, and that if I can think, I will thank.

I have to say that this is what I realize, that though I think that I don’t have enough of the things that I have as expectations, it is yet in the things I consider to be “small” that i should be most grateful about. How many times have i been spared me from an accident, or had my needs met in an unexpected way?

How many times have I been running late for one thing or the other something happened to make sure I caught up in good time with what I was running late for?

Or how many times has God had to endure my impatience just to show me that he is the one in charge?…all of that without yelling at me or telling me off? How many times would he have been justified to seize my life due to my rebellion in my thoughts towards the things that are unfathomable by my puny mind?

My wife then pointed out another reality, we, yes we are not where we used to be a year and two months ago… some of the things that seemed like tough tasks back then have now become like 2^nd nature and some of the things that we never realized we could enjoy have become our pleasures, at least for the moment, cos it can only get better..

Wow, indeed I have every reason to drop all and say a heartfelt “THANK YOU” to the one who formed me in my mother’s womb, brought me out into this world, took me through every single day of the years I’ve seen so far, gave me more than what money can ever pay for, has made promises and is able to fulfill them,

He has never panicked at the challenges I face daily but instead has promised to go through raging waters and even fire with me, as I write this, I am in the middle of a challenge, but I have a certain peace because I know that he’s not only got my back, but he has seen what lies ahead. I feel very happy and I am thankful for his wisdom, blessing and everything that he has bestowed on me.

Well, it’s still democracy day, and I choose to be thankful that I am Nigerian, that though not everything has gone the way I think it should go, it could have been worse! Our expectations will not be cut short.

God Bless NIGERIA!!!

P.S.

It’s independence day today Oct 1 and Nigeria is marking 53 years of independence… I see things getting better, irrespective of the current realities.. This post was initially written on May 29th, but purpose has it that it should be published on Independence day instead… There’s more than enough reason for us as NIGERIANS to bow the knee and say “Thank You”, to God for keeping us united and at peace. Just ask the Somalis, or the Congolese, we are blessed and most fortunate!

All the amenities and our expectations of “milk-and-honey” may not be available for our comfort at the moment, but let us be grateful for what we have and upon that platform build for ourselves the good to great things that we picture in our hearts about our country…

GOD BLESS NIGERIA!!!

DO IT YOURSELF

I get easily tired and weary especially when I feel what I have as a desire, should come as quickly as I have desired it. Essentially, what I am admitting to you is that I set myself up for a fail.

Set myself up for a fail? But, how, do I hear you ask? Why, are you slow?

When, for those who are curious because they empathize, do you set yourself up for a fail? Ah, let’s not kid ourselves with these questions, because the “I” in there, is actually mirroring you.

I set myself up for a fail by believing that what I desire would come to pass as soon as I desire it, or that desiring it alone is the end all and be all of it coming into reality.

Even nature teaches me that when I plant a seed in the soil, it’s not just because I feel like hiding my seed somewhere “safe”, or that I just woke up and said, “I feel like planting this seed today”, no. It started as a desire to see that I had more of that seed, or to prove my worth as a farmer or to even show off that I wasn’t to be left behind in the game of farming; whatever the reason, it was a desire.

But my desire did not come to fruition as soon as I desired it. It took time. Within that time frame, it took perseverance and careful nurturing to ensure that my initial goal was achieved.

O.k, I guess some of us are not into the farm bit, J but let’s not lose the sweet bit.

Understand that I am saying that whatever you desire requires you to take action, make progress within a given time frame that your desire stipulates after which the results would determine whether what you set out to achieve was worth it or not. But, it all started with that one desire.

At this point, I must confide in you, it takes guts and every ounce of encouragement available to not give up on the desire that made the journey necessary. I mean, I desire to be rich, but why is it taking so long? Why can’t I seem get a job? Why is no one noticing my efforts? Why is the pregnancy taking too long to happen? Why is it that when it seems I am down , circumstances still want to beat me into the ground? O,k, too many “whys” just so you’d see my point that there are so many reasons to give up.

It is important to look around and best of all within and find a reason to say, “This desire is worth the effort”.

So much has been said about individuals who were told they couldn’t become what they eventually became, how about adding your name to that list? Most times, looking at the word that brought you here, the idea is that you need an outer spur to egg you on to make your desire count, but hey, why wait for someone to do for you what you can do for yourself?

As I said, here, you need to be at the top of your game in ensuring that the thing that set you out on your “journey” in the first place doesn’t lose its essence.

The people who won the race are the people who refused to give up whether they were ahead or not, but after overcoming all odds, they became what circumstances had told them beforehand that they could never be. They told themselves and believed what they were saying that it was worth the effort and went after it with all passion.

What is obstructing you?

CHALLENGE

C- Consider

H- Harnessing

A- All

L- Life

L- Lessons

E- Essentially,

N- Never

G- Get

E- Exhausted.

After a day long experience of getting refreshed via reading books, I thought long and hard about what I learned especially putting myself in the scheme of what i’d learned. and yes, I did coin that acronym…

Back in 2010, I’d been considering my next move from the spot where I felt stuck but wasn’t sure about taking the next step that I knew I had to take because it involved me uprooting myself from the known, and walking towards the unknown.

The goal couldn’t have been clearer, that it was time for me to move to a place that my eyes saw as an ocean with little chance of survival as I was but a little fish with no hope of survival in that “ocean”.

My fear and consideration of what people would think about me and not the decision to follow through with what I knew was right to do, made me take a detour that was certainly what the Divine permitted but it wasn’t totally part of the plan.

How do I know? Hindsight is a great teacher you know. Truth be told, my fear told me that I wasn’t ready for the leap when all along it was the perfect time to leap, after all, when’s the best time to let go? Is it when you have it all or when you’ve lost it all? Is it when you’ve got nothing to lose or nothing to gain? My brain hurts…

Truth be told, fear was what made me to lose pace with what I should have been a few years back; reminds me about how the 10 out of the 12 Israel spies in the Bible came back with a mixed report that sowed seeds of chaos in the camp to the point that they rose up in unison asking that they be returned to the land of slavery and hardships.

The reality that I speak about though is that at the sight of each challenge, fear arises, blocking out the view of what glory lies beyond the challenge.

And the more I think about it, all I can tell myself is , “Andrew, Consider Harnessing All Life Lessons Essentially Never Get Exhausted”.

This is essentially what it means to me with each new challenge, that yes, the road would be rough, yes I would probably even feel like giving up and yes I may feel so afraid and alone… BUT if I do not give up on making it work, if I would always consistently be at it even when it seems not to be working, when all is said and done, the reward would be worth the effort.

Once I read a story in a book called “Touched by an E-mail” by Denny Mog;

“A man was instructed by God to go push against a rock that he really wanted to see broken down so he could make a road leading to his house which was in a forest.”

“Each day he pushed against it without fail, thinking it was his job to get that boulder out of the way. After several days, without managing to move the rock one inch, he finally cried out to God saying, “This is hopeless, what’s the essence of pushing against this rock, if I’m never going to be able to get it to move at all?”

“Then God asked him to look at his arms and body… in the process of pushing and all, his body had been “solidified” by muscles, all over him.”

He thought it was his prerogative to move the rock out of the way, but what he failed to see was that the process was to make him a better, fitter man.

And to make the story better, the government came and blew that rock out of the way in order to make an expressway.

So what is asking you to Consider Harnessing All Life Lessons Essentially Never Get Exhausted?

Make it count, your situation is not for your destruction, rather it is here to make you… Don’t give up, the end is in sight. Oh, need I tell you, or should I ask if you’ve ever noticed that the time you want to give up is when the solution is closest? When you walk away in defeat, if you’d observe carefully, you’d realize that you were so close to the end but you chose instead to walk away, like the saying goes, the darkest hour is just before dawn!

Think about it!!

(P.s. Couldn’t find a link to the book from where i read the story)